Scott & Penelope VI: Jack Attack
by n5d25d90
Summary: Jack and his newest acquaintance plan to rule the world with the Grim Reaper's scythe, and plan to waste Billy and his family in the process.  This contains Molotov cocktails and a reference to a Bruce Willis movie.
1. Chapter 1

I was given a request a while back for a story where Jack returns and Scott and Penelope got lost in the Underworld. I hope this person doesn't mind, but I ended up… "splitting it in half", if you will. What this basically means is I made a story about Jack returning and am still working on a story where Scott and Penelope get lost in the Underworld, but it's not going to be the same story. Even though they may not be what was expected, I hope you all enjoy them.

As was mentioned before, there is a reference to a Bruce Willis movie near the end of the fanfiction. Though this will still carry some humor along with it, it's more of a suspenseful fanfic than a humor fanfic. I've decided to rate it T because of the fact that there are crazy psychos with Molotov cocktails in this fanfic.

I own Scott and Penelope. Maxwell Atoms owns Billy, Mandy, Grim, and related characters.

-1-

Mandy sat in the kitchen with a cup of coffee in her hands. It was 3:00 in the morning on a Saturday, but she wasn't tired. She was thinking too much to be tired.

Grim walked in, shocked. "Mandy? What are you doin' up so late?"

Mandy didn't look up. "I could ask you the same thing, Grim."

"Late-night reaping," Grim replied. "Now you."

Mandy sighed. "Grim? You ever get the feeling that something **REALLY** bad is about to happen?"

"Oh yeah. All de time."

Mandy shook her head. "This is different. It's big this time. I can feel it…"

"Don't worry, mon. Not'ing's gonna happen."

"How do you know?"

"Uh… I don't… but I'm sure what you're feeling is not'ing. Now, go to sleep, child."

"No thanks. I won't be sleeping for a while. This is my third cup of coffee."

"Oh. Well… goodnight," Grim said, going to bed.

"Goodnight, Grim."

When Grim left, Mandy sighed again. "Grim's lying. Something is definitely wrong." She gulped the coffee down and got up from her chair. "But… what could it be…?"

-X-

In the bowels of the Underworld, over a bridge of fiery magma, stood two hooded figures in cloaks. One figure, using a cane to hold himself up, looked at the other, who was raising his arms in excitement.

"At long last, you and I will reign over **THE ENTIRE WORLD!" **the second figure cackled.

"How?" the first figure asked, leaning on his cane.

"Simple, my fiendish friend: with the Grim Reaper's scythe!"

The first figure yawned. "So? We've tried to steal it before. Unsuccessfully, I might add."

The second figure shook his head. "Reginald, Reginald… why are you so naïve? Before, we were separate, but together we will reign supreme! And besides, we're now **IMMORTAL!** How can he stop us when we have the power of the Underworld on our side?"

"True… but how do we get the scythe?"

"Simple again, Reginald," the second man sneered as he pulled a feather from his cloak.

"A… feather?" the first man asked with no amusement, almost losing his balance on his cane from boredom.

"Hey, it's worked before…" The second man's laughter was heard throughout the Underworld.

-X-

Scott entered the kitchen, noticing his mom was now pacing the floor.

"Are… you okay, Mom?"

"Yeah… I had way too much coffee this morning. I've… been awake… for four hours," she said, twitching constantly.

"Uh… do you need to lie down?"

"No-no-no-no-no. I'll be fine."

"Geez, Mom. You're like Dad when he eats 20 Atomic Frenzy cakes."

"Don't you ever compare me to you father, Scott," Mandy scolded before lifting his hat and giving him a noogie.

"OW! Stop! I'm sorry!"

"Pathetic," Mandy said, letting him go.

Suddenly, a loud, girly scream pierced the air, almost shattering Mandy's and Scott's ears. The scream was followed by giddy laughter.

"Grim!" Mandy yelled. She and Scott ran into the living room.

What they saw shocked them.

Grim was being tickled by a feather.

But that wasn't what shocked Mandy. What shocked her was the man holding the feather.

The man turned his pumpkin-headed face to Mandy. "Jack's back…"


	2. Chapter 2

I own Scott and Penelope. That's it. It doesn't go any deeper than that.

The Bruce Willis reference hasn't happened yet, so you know. There's some foreshadowing leading up to it, but it doesn't reach its peak until chapter four. You can guess though if you want.

It'll probably also be easier to guess if you've seen the movie. I will give you a hint, though. Think of a Bruce Willis movie that had Molotov cocktails in it. That's the only hint I'll give you and for all I know it's a good enough hint to give it away.

-2-

"Scott!" Mandy yelled. "Don't let Jack get the scythe!"

A still confused Scott sprung into action. He reached for Grim's scythe, but he was tackled down by a hooded man.

Mandy's eyes widened. "SCOTT!" She ran toward him, but the hooded man hit her in the stomach with the top of his cane. She twitched as she fell to the ground.

The figure laughed as he used his cane to lift himself back to his feet. "That would've been more satisfying if you were Billy."

Mandy glared at the man. "You've got to be kidding…"

The man pulled down his hood.

Mandy's eyes showed a brilliant intensity as she glared at him angrily. "Skarr…"

Skarr took a death ray out of "hammerspace" and pointed it toward Mandy. "Hasta la vista, baby!"

"Stop!" Jack shouted. "I didn't bring you back to kill them, Skarr. Not yet, anyway… Besides, I got the scythe!"

Sure enough, Grim was yet again tickled to submission, and Jack had the scythe. "Toodles!" Jack cackled as he created a portal with the scythe. Skarr jumped in first, then Jack.

"Oh, no you don't!" Scott yelled as he jumped in after them.

"**SCOTT!"** Mandy shouted, but it was too late…

-X-

Billy woke up to the sound of Mandy's shouting. "Oh, crud. Scott drank the last of the orange juice, didn't he?" He got up and stretched. "At least it wasn't me this time."

Suddenly, the bedroom door opened and Mandy appeared: bloodshot, messy-haired, and breathing heavily.

Once again, Billy was turned on.

"Scott's gone!" Mandy yelled. Then she recognized the look on his face. "Okay, I take back everything I said about you never thinking, but can you think of something else please? Like…oh, I don't know… **OUR SON'S MISSING!"**

After about five seconds, Billy reacted. "Oh no! Penelope!"

"Scott."

"Oh no! Scott! Where is he?!"

"Uh…if I knew…he wouldn't be missing…"

Grim walked up to them. "Maybe I can help."

"How?" Mandy growled. "It's your fault he's gone!"

"Yes, but if I know anyt'ing about Jack O'Lantern, it's dat he is very predictable. I would say he'd be at a pumpkin patch."

Mandy looked out the bedroom window. "Well, Grim may be right."

Grim's eye sockets lit up. "Really? …Why?"

"See for yourself."

Grim looked out the same window. "Ah. I see."

Billy, once again being left in the dark, asked, "What?"

"A horde of evil pumpkins are coming dis way," Grim explained.

"All we have to do is find the source and we find Scott," Mandy added.

"**YIPEE!!!"** Billy shouted. "We're going on an adventure!"

-X-

Scott growled. "You'll never get away with this!" He was tied to the back of a giant pumpkin.

"Ah, but I already have," Jack chuckled. "You see, after I destroy your precious city, and possibly you as well, I'm going after your precious reaper. Then, I'll become the reaper, marry a hot blonde whose eyes somehow turn red for no apparent reason, have two one-eyed kids and rule the resulting, completely-parodied-slash-ripped-off wasteland with an iron fist! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! …Now, won't that be fun?"

"Not on my wa…hey, how come all that sounds familiar?" Scott asked.

Jack handed a copy of the previous S & P fanfiction.

"Oh…right. Grim Tales," Scott nodded in understanding.

"Do we need a disclaimer for that?" Jack asked.

"I dunno."

**(A/N: Grim Tales was made by Bleedman)**

"Ah, there we go," Jack said. "Now, on to **WORLD DOMINATION!** MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"


	3. Chapter 3

I know it's been too long since I've updated. Just imagine how Mouse Race fans must feel… or worse… Aftermath fans…

EEK!

Speaking of which, do you think I should bring Aftermath to this site? It's a DP/TT crossover that I had left about half-way finished on a DP fanfic proboard, and I feel bad about that but I've never gotten the time to update it…

…

For two years…

Which reminds me, I need to update N.C. SHOW too sometime…

Anywho, back to the fic! I only own Scott and Penelope.

-3-

Penelope walked into the living room. "Ma? Dad? Grim? Scott? Anybody home?"

She searched the kitchen.

The den.

The bedrooms.

The garage.

Heck, she even looked in the toilet!

"Nope! They're not in there. Hmm…I wonder where they--AHH!"

-X-

"Your plan's still not going to work," Scott smugly said.

Jack grinned. "And who's going to stop me?"

The sounds of pumpkin smashing were heard in the distance.

"A protective mother with a long history of causing violent acts, maybe?" Scott grinned.

"A minor threat, my boy," Jack said with hatred. "Besides, I have not one, but two prisoners…"

Scott's grin faded. "No…"

Just then, Skarr appeared through a portal, dragging an unconscious Penelope behind him. "This cane is useful after all." He threw the scythe at Jack, who caught it in mid-air.

"Take them to the warehouse, Skarr. I'll be there shortly, but first I must visit our feisty blonde friend," Jack said.

Skarr grinned and tied Penelope to the back of another giant pumpkin. "You know, working as an army commander bent on world domination has shown me many interesting military strategies, defenses, and, of course, weaponry. Jack and I share a common favorite…you know, besides the scythe of course." He pulled a bottle out of his pocket. "An ordinary bottle is never much of a weapon unless broken, but even then it doesn't cause enough damage. But if you add a rag, some gasoline, and a light…"

Scott cringed.

"…and you can become one deadly MacGyver…"

-X-

"Mandy! Calm down!" Grim shouted. He was covered from skull to metatarsals with pumpkin gunk.

Mandy growled. "They have my baby! I'm not going to stop until…" She fell to her knees.

Billy screamed. "Mandy!" He kneeled next to her and held her. "You okay?"

"Let…go…of…me…"

Billy nodded and obeyed. Getting up to his feet, he watched as the pumpkin army advanced. There was no way that Mandy could do this by herself. Their best bet was to find Grim's scythe, and to do that, they had to find Jack.

-X-

"So wait a minute," Scott said as Skarr tied him and Penelope to a post in a nearby abandoned warehouse. "You're going to set the place on fire using Molotov cocktails?"

Skarr was impressed. "Very good, Scott…"

"…Why not kill us now?" Scott asked. "What's the point of leaving us here and giving our Mom a chance to save us?"

"It's more fun this way," Skarr grinned as he limped away.

-X-

Five minutes later, Mandy regained her composure and started beating up more pumpkins, but it wasn't long before she fell again, scaring Billy.

But the fall wasn't what scared Billy. It was something else:

She was crying.

Mandy never cried!

…Did she?

Laughter pierced the air, grabbing Billy's and Grim's attentions. Jack appeared out of a cloud of smoke. Keeping his distance, he made his presence known. "You'll never save 'em in time…"

Mandy looked up in shock. This was now a whole new ballgame.

"Your kids are in a warehouse a few blocks thataway," Jack said, pointing in its direction. "Now, you have a choice: save the world, or save your children…"

Mandy looked at Billy. Then at Grim. Then back at Jack. "The world can wait." She got up and started running.

"Wait!" Billy shouted as he and Grim ran after her. The only sound louder to him than his heart beating was the laughter of the pumpkin-headed psycho.


	4. Chapter 4

Okay, during this chapter is the reference to the Bruce Willis movie I told you about. I want to see how many of you can guess it BEFORE Scott mentions it. There's no way I can tell if you actually figured it out on your own, so please be honest. Oh, and sorry if I spoiled the movie for you.

I own Scott and Penelope. Maxwell Atoms owns the rest of the characters. I also do not own the Bruce Willis movie (but I have rented it from the local library).

-4-

Skarr looked out a window. "Here comes the cavalry!"

Scott finally understood. "Wait…I get it now! You want to get rid of all of us at the same time!"

Skarr laughed. "Nothing gets past you." He placed a rag in each of the already armed bottles.

-X-

The door fell down and standing in the doorway were Billy and Mandy holding Grim in a "battering ram" position.

Mandy growled. "Skarr! Where's my son!"

Skarr appeared from a balcony. "What about your daughter?"

She gasped. "Penelope's here too?"

Grim spoke up. "Well, Jack did say 'kids' and 'children', did he not?"

"Hey, I miss things when I'm too busy being ticked off," Mandy said.

Skarr took this opportunity to light a Molotov cocktail. He threw it down from the balcony.

Grim gasped and pulled Billy and Mandy away just in time. The room started to go up in flames.

"Holy cheese whiz!" Billy shouted as more Molotovs rained down. "What is this? Grand Theft Auto?"

Skarr pulled out a tranquilizer gun and shot Mandy in the leg.

"MANDY!" Billy shouted, running over to her as she fell. He caught her in his arms and looked into her eyes. Her vision started to blur.

Billy, of course, didn't know that, and started bawling. This aggravated Skarr, who threw a rock at his head to shut him up. This knocked Billy out, even though Billy was still sitting up straight (he was propped up against a box).

Mandy was fading fast. The last thing she saw before passing out was Billy's unconscious head.

Skarr had an evil grin on his face…until he noticed Grim was gone. "Where did that bone-head go?"

-X-

"Grim!" Scott shouted as he saw a familiar looking skeleton appear in the doorway.

"I'm getting you outta here!" Grim said as he untied the two.

"Where's Mom and Dad?"

"Dey're knocked out. I'll get dem outta here later," he said as he lifted them over his shoulders and ran out of the room.

When Grim reached the main room, a falling Molotov stopped him in his tracks. They heard fast footsteps behind them, and eventually Skarr appeared behind them. "None of you are leaving this warehouse alive."

Suddenly, Skarr was zapped.

"What de heck?" Grim asked.

Skarr fell over, revealing Jack with Grim's scythe.

"Any last words, Grim ol' buddy?" Jack asked as he pulled out a lit Molotov cocktail.

Scott, being in a scared state, looked around. Suddenly, something occurred to him: Jack taking out Skarr, Jack holding a Molotov cocktail, the room on fire, Billy and Mandy in that specific position nearby, and a bald guy trying to save a young brother and sister out of a seemingly impossible situation.

Other than the fact that Billy and Mandy were still alive, this looked oddly familiar…

"Hey, wait a minute!" Scott said. "Since when did we start ripping off the movie _Hostage_?"

Grim looked around. "Hey! You're right! And dat means…I'm Bruce Willis! Sweet!"

"That also means that Jack is Mars," Scott added, "so Jack is going to drop the Molotov and melt himself and we can escape!"

Jack burst into laughter. "You're kidding, right? If I remember correctly, Mars was wounded AND he loved the girl, thus resulting in dropping the Molotov and killing himself." He gestured toward Penelope. "I wouldn't drop a HAT for her!" He laughed harder.

After a few minutes, he regained his composure. "Now, where was I? Ah, yes. Any last words, Grim? How about you, little girl?" He leaned toward Scott. "How about you, Scotty?"

Scott's expression changed from scared to ticked off in less than a second. "What did you call me?"

"Uh-oh," Grim and Penelope said at the same time.

"What?" Jack asked obliviously.

"No one calls me Scotty," Scott said monotonously as he walked forward.

"You're…kidding, right?" Jack asked, slowly stepping backward. "Are you CRAZY?! I have a freakin' Molotov cocktail in my hand!"

"You can kidnap me, threaten my family, and attempt world domination, but when you call me Scotty, I guarantee heads will roll…"

Jack couldn't believe what he just heard. "Hello! Molotov freaking cocktail!"

"You could be carrying a cross and be the Queen of England for all I care. No. One. Calls. Me. Scotty…"

"Grim, do you have any idea how freaking crazy this kid is?" Jack yelled. "Tell the little runt that I have both your scythe and a Molotov cocktail in my possession and I'm not afraid to use them!"

Scott grinned. "If you aren't afraid, why are you backing up…?"

Jack gulped. "Mommy…"


	5. Chapter 5

WARNING: The following sentence is full of insane randomness, so read with caution:

Man, I don't know if you guys have ever played Final Fantasy VI Advance, but that's like crack to me…

Okay, all randomness aside, here's the final chapter of S & P 6.

-5-

If you thought burning down a building and trying to kill people with Molotov cocktails was hardcore, I probably shouldn't tell you what Scott did to Jack, so let's go ahead about a week…

Jack was sent to Underworld Hospital. Despite already being dead, he was suffering from internal bleeding, as well as broken bones, a partially smashed pumpkin head, Charlie horses, you name it.

What happened to the Molotov in Jack's hand? Well, Jack was so freaked out he threw it to the side, where no one else was, in sheer terror. Wimp.

_Hostage _was relived yet again as Grim saved everyone from the fire. Luckily, Billy and Mandy didn't follow the movie's status quo and were rescued as well; however, they still had problems. Mandy had enough tranquilizer to take down an elk and Billy had a concussion, so they decided to lay off the adventures for a while.

Grim got his scythe back. This must be his 14,738th time he's lost it already and gained it back. Because of this, I always like to think of the scythe as a championship title belt, and whoever has it is the Champion of Death. I believe it was Randy Orton (but it could've been someone else) who once said that Ric Flair may be great because he won the World Heavyweight Championship 16 times, but then again he also LOST the title 16 times. Well, since Grim lost his "title" 14,738 times, Ric Flair actually comes out smelling like daisies anyway. But you have to give Grim credit, though: since he has the scythe again, he's a 14,739-time Champ! Go Grim!

Penelope wasn't very traumatized by this event. Either she thought she was dreaming or Molotov cocktails just make her thirsty (you know, 'cause it's a bottle) and she was more preoccupied with that thought.

Once again, Scott saved the day due to someone adding one freaking letter to his last name. The Nergals should be lucky that they only got crotch shots.

Skarr suffered minimal injuries. Of course, being already dead, he has quite a while to heal up from them. He'll probably spend the time sitting on a chair watching "Mr. Meaty" and listening to Michael Bolton music, which was his punishment that Judge Roy Spleen gave him for crimes against humanity.

He's been having nightmares ever since…

-X-

YO DAWGS! IT'S EPILOGUE TIME! HOLLA! (To appreciate how funny that is, I'm white)

"What did we learn today, Penelope?" Scott asked.

"Never to call you Scotty?"

"And?"

"…"

"Yeah, I guess that's pretty much it."

"Now what?"

"Sixty seconds," the director whispered.

"Dang…uh…"

"Well, we could talk about the _Hostage_ reference," Scott said.

"Um…okay…"

"So, Mom and Dad were supposed to be like the two brothers near the end of the movie. You see, the younger brother was thrown off a balcony and the older one picked him up and Mars shot him. Even the fact that Mom passed out after Dad was a reference to the younger brother seeing his brother's dead face and dying right after."

"EW! Thanks a lot! I'm going to have nightmares now!"

"Sorry. Too creepy for you?"

"No! You spoiled the movie! Spoilers give me nightmares!"

"…Say what?"

"Spoilers give me nightmares!" Penelope repeated.

"20 seconds," the director whispered.

Scott had an evil grin on his face. "Did you see the Teen Titans series finale?"

"No," Penelope replied.

"It ended with Beast Boy running into a light."

"SCOTT! …Wait…a light bulb or a flash of light?"

"Flash of light."

"SCOTT!"

"What? You asked."

"6…5…"

Scott and Penelope started fighting; a cloud of smoke censored it all. Suddenly, they hit the camera and break it. Everything goes black.

"Ugh!" the director groaned. "You couldn't wait one second to break the camera? Great! Now I gotta pay you guys overtime…"

CLUNK!

"…What was that?" the director asked.

Scott sighed. "Penelope ran into that structure thing that looks like the red structures from Sonic 3."

"Launch Base Zone?"

"Yeah."

"Ouch! Is she okay?"

"Yeah, yeah," Scott said monotonously. "She's fine. I'll be in my trailer…"


End file.
